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Women: Why you're Underpaid--And How to Change That

Women often ask why men tend to get paid more than women. We'll talk about that--but more importantly, what are you going to do about it? You Don't have to be underpaid. Note: underpaid men can listen in.

Why Does This Happen?
Years ago, people thought women who worked for pay were taking a job from a man with a family to support. If women were hired at all, it was usually at a much lower rate. They thought that women Don't need to work. Old thinking dies hard. Some of that mindset is still around today.

More importantly, women are often less assertive in salary negotiations. It goes against your upbringing, doesn't it? you're taught to be "nice." You were admonished to "avoid confrontation." Heaven help you if someone saw you as "pushy" or 'aggressive." 

Now, consider this:  some research shows women and men often gOT the same initial salary offer, but the men got paid more because THEY ASKED FOR MORE. THE WOMEN didn't.

The Consequences
When women Don't learn to play the game of negotiations, it can be devastating to their incomes. we're not just talking about a lower initial salary either. Since raises are often based on a percentage of current earnings, the negative impact of poorly negotiating starting pay gets magnified over the years. One study estimated that a 22-year-old woman who accepts a $25,000 starting salary instead of negotiating for $30,000 could lose over $500,000 by the time she reaches 60. Besides the obvious financial disaster, it can also have devastating impacts on a woman's self-esteem, attitude, and future promotions.



Here's What Happened To Cindy
A client we'll call Cindy was a superstar in her department. For five years, she'd gotten the tough assignments, and masterfully completed them. She loved her job--and they loved her. All was going spectacularly well. Then, one day,  a co-worker passed around a list showing the salaries of everyone in the department. Cindy was stunned to see that a man recently hired at her level was earning $10,000 more than she was. Cindy knew this man was doing much less work and wasn't nearly as capable.

Cindy said, "That day, I lost all motivation for the job. After that, I just went through the motions." She was no longer the office superstar, and became a prime candidate for a layoff and career downfall. Fortunately, a friend suggested that she get career coaching, and she started working on a job move before she suffered the consequences of her declining performance.

We spent quite a bit of time with Cindy to overcome her reluctance to ask for more. We told her that by developing skill in negotiations, women not only get more money, but they also tend to get more respect. Often, their work is valued more than when they just accept whatever is offered.

Here's what we recommended to Cindy

1) Realize that being a skillful negotiator is different than being "pushy" and "obnoxious." Employers expect applicants to negotiate.

2) Do your homework to find out what people are getting paid for the kind of work you want. Good sources include web sites like salary.com, professional associations, peers, and watching postings that list salaries.

3) Study the rules of salary negotiations (Jack Chapman's book, "Negotiating Your Salary: How to Make $1,000 a Minute" is nationally recognized as a "bible" for job hunters). Develop your responses to employer salary questions.

4) Practice with a friend, family member, or career coach so that you anchor your new responses and the new behavior in your body.

Cindy went through considerable angst when preparing for negotiations with her next employer. She was sure she was being "ungrateful" for negotiating with them, and feared they would get angry and rescind the offer. She was delighted to see that none of that happened.

Based in part on her research, we suggested that she push hard for more money and certain benefits and perks. She was floored when they agreed to hike her pay by $10,000 PLUS give her a number of benefits and perks, including tuition reimbursement for her MBA program.

Like many women, Cindy found that she can win the salary negotiations game.  You can too.

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